THE ONE WHERE RACHEL LETS ROSS TRY OUT HIS BRAND NEW SPANKING TOYS HE BOUGHT FROM THE SEX SHOP ON HER FAT BOTTOM...[Honestly, I tried to think of a snappier title but failed - author]
Rachel stood in the open-plan kitchen slicing and dicing some serious vegetables for the evening meal. She'd finished early at Central Perk and thought she'd surprise her boyfriend of two months with a delicious meat and vegetable hotpot. "Two whole months ?!!" she smiled to herself as a whole carrot was hung, drawn and quartered with skilled ease.
Amazing, two months. Who would of believed it ? Certainly not her. Ross may of had a long standing crush on her since they were kids but he was geeksville personified when they'd been at school together. Then, Ross was the kind of guy who wore his shirts tucked into his underpants. It was ironic, but she knew she had never given the gangly Mr Geller a second look or thought in those days. Especially when he grew that Groucho Marx moustache that made him look like Tom Sellecks twin brother.
She sighed at the memories as she picked up the slicing board, went over to the oven and using the knife, slid the diced carrots and suede into the pan where the meat was stewing nicely on medium heat. Once done, she gave the wooden board a quick clean with Mr Sqweezy and picked up her glass of wine. It sure as hell had been an interesting two months that was for sure....
As was only natural, the first month and a half had mostly been taken up with pure unadulterated sex. Sure they'd gone on romantic dates to the movies, theatre or spent some time enjoying moonlight meals at various restaurants but, and there was no point trying to avoid the subject here, they'd spent just as much time screwing each other stupid. She certainly wasn't embarrassed about that. Not at all. She had no problem admitting she enjoyed sex enormously. Why should she be ashamed of admitting as much ? After all, wasn't this the 21st century ? Women's liberation and all that jazz. She'd certainly taught her stuffy palientologist a thing or two about human coupling. Besides, she loved watching him imitate Goofy when he hit the roof during one of their "animalistic" sessions. So sex was great. Better than she thought it'd be. Ross having a rather impressive dick certainly helped things too of course. So she was happy, contented and, not to put too fine a point on it, was in serious trouble of developing the John Wayne walk. Wide eyed and legless. But that had all changed about two weeks ago....when she'd asked Ross about his "IT"
Rachel slipped into a table chair and instantly regretted it. "Ummm...ooooo." she mumbled softly as she gingerly resettled her rear-end back down. Only this time gentler. Her bottom was still sore after last nights "episode". She took another sip of wine, her lips mulling over the tang and turning into a wry smile of bemusement at her own actions and reactions to discovering that she actually....no ACTUALLY quite liked letting Ross do his thing with her backside. So what was last night ? Four ? No.....wait, she'd forgotten about Sunday last when Ross had grabbed her in the shower and bent her naked over the bathtub while he gave her a fairly hard spanking with each slap sounding twice as loud due to the spray. After he had finished she'd practically jumped his bones (oh..ha ha) and was amazed they'd both managed to stagger to work on the following Monday morning. No, that would be five. Over the two weeks he'd spanked her five times. Though she knew the horny dinosaur would of done it more if he could. He was probably just shy. She laughed out loud. "Suuuuuure !!"
"Spanking huh ?" she mused, mulling over the wine absent-mindedly. It wasn't so bad at all. After the initial fright of the first time when he'd been so pissed off with her telling Pheebs about their little secret that he had literally grabbed her, threw her resisting over his lap and tanned her hide while she threatened she was definitely going to castrate him......when he let her up.
It was then fate opened the manual of her sexuality and decided to add another page after "Greek...penchant for backdoor plumbing when in right mood." and she discovered she actually enjoyed the feel of it, the unexpected thrill of it and the outrageous kinkiness of it. Hmmm, maybe that was the secret. It was kinky. Out of the norm. Doing something out of the ordinary. Sort of thumbing her nose at conventional wisdom about what and how the career woman of today was supposed to act. Yeah, that was it. He was doing something kinky with - to her and she liked it. Kinky is as kinky does. What had he called it again ? Oh yes, stuff. Her boyfriend liked to do stuff.
With her free hand she reached behind herself and idly rubbed her tush. "Stuff huh ?" she said aloud. Maybe there was other "stuff" they could try. She took another sip as she glanced at the clock wondering what Ross was doing at work now.....
*
Elsewhere....
Ross picked up the T-Rex tooth turning it this way and that marvelling at its simple perfection. He put it back in its wrapping and placed it carefully in its box. He was standing in a large room filled with row upon row of tall bookcases. Bookcases that didnt hold books but were filled with dinosaur artifacts and fossils from all over the world. It was a library of sorts he supposed.
"Hi Professor Geller, working late again ?" said someone behind him suddenly.
Ross turned. "Hi Charlie." he smiled, as the Janitor walked up to him with a set of keys jangling away as they hung from his belt. "No, not tonight. Just got to put back some stuff in the amphibian section then I'm off. You can only be dedicated for so long." he laughed at his own joke.
Charlie stood and rested his hand on his broom. "Ah, yah can't fool me Sir. That special lady waiting for you huh ?" he teased. Charlie liked the young man. He was good, kind and always made the effort to say hello when he was closing down the museum. Only the love of a good woman could make someone look that happy.
Ross laughed and pointed a finger at the older man. "For a man of sixty Charlie you sure know your stuff. That obvious huh ? Yep, you're right. She is a special lady, though a little hard to handle. " he laughed.
"Ah, hard to handle huh ? "said the Janitor as he headed off whistling. "Do what I do with my old lady Sir. Make sure you keep a nice broad paddle hanging behind the kitchen door for emergencies !!" he chuckled as he disappeared into the shadows of the museum.
Ross shook his head in amusement. "You sly fox." he smiled. "A paddle huh ?" Now there's a thing. He suddenly had a picture in his minds eye of Rachel bending over with her hands on her knee's as he stood over her slapping the end of an extremely nasty looking black leather paddle in the palm of his other hand. Now there's a thought to keep a man happy while he worked. He wondered if she would go along with letting him do that sort of "stuff" on her rear-end. Perhap's it was a whacking too far. He should be grateful that she was letting him spank her ass in the first place. "Don't rock the boat Geller, just don't rock the dammed boat..."
Still seeing visions of Rachel with a black and blue backside he made his way towards a table where a number of boxes were stacked waiting to be put back on their shelves. That afternoon a party of kids from the local school had been given a tour and Ross had used them as a teaching exercise. He knew one thing, kids loved bones. As he put each box carefully back all he could think of was what the Janitor had said.......
*
Rachel heard the door click shut.
"That you hon ?" she called from the kitchen.
Ross entered carrying his bag, coming to stand behind her to hug her and nuzzle her neck. "Hmmmmm, you smell good, taste good and hey....that looks good enough to eat !!" he teased as he rubbed his crotch against her bum and dipped his finger into the boiling brew for a quick taste.
Wriggling free, Rachel slapped his hand away and turned wielding a big ladle. "You been buying batteries for that little lightsabre of yours again sweetie ?" she laughed. "You're going to wear it out if you're not careful."
Ross lent back against the fridge door. "Oh ho ho. Not so much of the little !!" he said with grinning surprise. "And who's to blame for THAT anyway huh ? Can't recall her name but I do know that she has a fantastic bottom. A bottom that has been giving her man a hard time lately."
Rachel snorted and turned back to stirring dinner. "Hard time ? Speak for yourself. Its your fetish honey, not mine. I'm just in it for the ride - so long as its standing afterwards !!"
Folding his arms, Ross sighed contentedly and nodded. "You're right, you are so right. It is my fetish. But then again, if it is, how come when we're in bed you always say "Gee Ross, don't you want to you know....do IT tonight ? I don't mind honest !!" - after we've had great sex ? I reckon you're getting a taste for having your little bottom soundly spanked."
Ross ducked as Rachel threw a towel at him. "Little ?" she muttered with a devilish smile. "Hah, you certainly didn't think that last night after you'd spanked it hard and I was squealing for you to stop remember ?!! Which, by the way Ross, is called acting. Sometimes when I mean no I don't. Its a woman's perogative to say things she doesn't mean. Understand ?"
Ross rubbed his temple. "Sorta. Last time I tried to understand women I ended up sucking breastmilk through a rubber teat."
Rachel ignored him as he stuck out his tongue. She could tell he was in a playful mood and that usually led to some serious and sweaty yoga between the sheets. Maybe she shouldn't of cooked a big dinner. Perhap's a sandwich was a better idea. Cut to the chase real quick. "Anyway, where was I ?" she frowned as she picked up the double handled pan and carried it over to the kitchen table where Ross had already taken his seat. "Oh, that's right, my ass. Think your exact words were - "God Rachel, I really, truly love your big fat Greek ass so don't you dare think about liposuction ok !!." Seem to recall too that I was lying on my face with your nose between my red asscheeks that you'd just walloped when you said that."
Ross shrugged, waving his spoon around as Rachel scooped out the stew from the pan into his bowl. "Well, what can I say ? I have exquisite taste. You do have a big fat Greek ass Rach and I worship it every day believe me."
Picking up a napkin Rachel took her seat. "That's nice to hear honey. Never thought of my ass as some sort of kinky Buddah. Can't say I'm surprised either. You spend most of our personal time together either up it or paddling it." she laughed as she blew on her spoon and took a bite.
Ross grinned at her as he sat chewing. She had said paddling. In his head he remembered the Janitor's words. He was thinking about doing stuff again. Would she be up for it ? Could he persuade her to try it just once. She'd sometimes say that she'd "always try anything once." Ross dipped his bread in the stew and popped it into his mouth. Well, there was only one way to find out.
If only she knew what he'd brought home in his bag.
*
Having sex with Rachel Ross had discovered was an ear-splitting experience. She was totally different from his ex-wife, the one who turned out to be a lesbian. Like chalk and cheese they were. His ex was one for soft sighs whilst Rachel made dammed sure everyone in the neighbourhood knew she was getting her rocks off big time. Rachel was also a bit of a sexual contortionist that would put a gymnast to shame. Wow, talk about your flexable girlfriend !! No wonder he was a total zombie these days at work. Making love with Rachel felt like he'd gone 10 rounds with an female Russian shot-putter. Still, he had to uphold the honor of the male Geller lineage. Always standing proud and erect for when duty called. It was no small matter of pride (and ego, of course) to be able to say that he made sure he satisfied his woman between the sheets every time they did it. Yup, under that cool, calm exterior of an outworldly respectable Museum Professor beat the heart of a bona-fide stud muffin.
"Ohhhhhh......" moaned Rachel suddenly."OhhhhhHHHHHHMYYYYYYYYGOOOOODDDDD!!!!" she squealed as she hugged her sweaty and pounding lover too her like a demented octopuss as she climxed under him. "YEEEEEEEEES YEEEEEEEEEES YEEEEEEEEESSSSS!!!!!!!!"
Ross winced as she screamed into his left ear. "Ow." he gasped as he continued impaling her on his rampaging prong. He was close too. His walnuts felt the size of grapefruits and his scrotum was as tight as a drum as he rodgered her silly. He grabbed her legs and threw her ankles over both his shoulders bearing her deeper down into the mattress. A few more strokes and he would unload a healthy doze of Geller DNA up her slippery chute.
Rachel meanwhile was still hollering loudly, oblivious to the world other than what was happening down below her belly button. It was scary and wonderful at the same time. She had her eyes squeezed shut and could feel the electric tingles of hot flushes that had her gasping and trembling like a leaf swirling in some sexual gale. This was a big one. A real big one and she didn't care who knew it. Luckily, the neighbours were in their late 60's and deaf as two short planks. Another wave hit her and she jerked her head upwards and sank her teeth into his shoulder. Ross yelped but kept going. "N...ner..ner...NOW ROSS. DO IT RIGHT NOWWWWWWWWWWWWW ROSS NOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooo!!!"
With a final frantic thrust of his hips she heard Ross grunt "Ohhhhhhhh fuuuuuuuuuooooooo!!"
Nice one Obi-Wan Kenobi. The force will be with you always.
*
Ross popped a peanut into his mouth as he lay in bed watching Rachel pad around the room stark naked. He let his gaze wander up and down her body, admiring the perfection of it and the way everything about it seemed just right. Her skin was still shining from their love-making as she approached the bottom of their bed and knelt up to lay down on her belly where she scissored her feet happily up and down, ankle's crossed. He offered her the peanut bowl.
"Hmmmm, peanuts." she laughed. "A post coital snack. I feel soooooooooooooo relaxed. Don't think I have a bone in my body. God honey, that was great. What do you fancy doing now ?" she asked giving him a sexy wink that seemed to say that she was game for anything. Which at that moment she was. Doing things had been on her mind all day. Doing stuff as he usually put it. She licked her lips. If she had her way she'd be nursing another very sore bottom tomorrow morning at work.
Unknown to her, Ross was thinking along the same lines. But thinking about and expressing it was two totally different matters. Asking to spank her was fine, she knew he liked to do that. But other stuff ? Stuff that would be more painful for her ? He could feel his earlier resolve disappearing like some bay sea mist.
"Fancy ?" he muttered, his gaze falling onto her upthrust bare behind. He fancied doing a whole load of different things with it if given half the chance. He popped another peanut in his mouth. "Well, you know I told you about stuff ?"
*
Rachel knelt wide-eyed on the bed as he came back into the bedroom carrying his work-bag. She realised that he'd also been thinking about the same things as she had been doing lately. Chewing her lip, she looked up at him as he came to sit beside her. "You want to do other stuff with me to...my...my ass ?" she whispered.
Ross nodded. "Only if you want to Rachel. But if you're willing to try something else, yes, I'd like to do other stuff with you." he finished with honesty. They both realised what they decided now would take things, their relationship, to another level. He noticed her gaze flicking too and fro from his face to the bag.
Rachel stuck out her tongue and ran it slowly along her upper lip. "I guess I did say I'd try anything once didn't I ?" she breathed, each perfect breast rising and falling.
Ross nodded.
She could feel her heart hammering in her chest though it seemed to sound louder in her head. Everything was pounding. Her skin was tingling with anticipation. But by far the greatest sensation was in her backside. Her heart didn't rule her head....it was her ass. "Wh...what's in the bag ?" she said quietly, hesitantly.
Her mouth dropped wide open in shock as Ross unzipped the bag, reached in and took out a huge.......thing.
*
"What is that ?!!!!" she gasped horrified, but fascinated at the same time.
"It's a ummmm paddle." Ross smiled.
"A what?!!"
"A paddle." he said again.
Rachel took it from him. "Its huge !! I read an article once in Cosmopolitan about women who liked this sort of stuff but I've never seen a real one before. It feels like leather, is it ?" she asked, interested despite herself.
He smiled and scratched his ear self-conciously. "Er, yep, guess so."
"Where'd you get it from ?" Where DID he get this from ?!!!
Ross scratched his nose, a habit he had when he was embarrassed about something. "Uhhh, you know that ummm...sex shop on 5th Avenue ?"
Rachel was so shocked she nearly dropped the paddle. "Sex shop ??" she laughed with surprise."You went INTO a sex shop ????" This was, like, totally amazing. Ross Geller in a sex shop. Joey and Chandler yes, Ross....no. "And you actually bought this...this..." she held up the impliment.
Ross sat grinning like a kid in a sweet shop. "Amongst other things...."
"Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat????!!!"
*
Rachel thought she must be dreaming. Or maybe it would turn out to be some sort of painful nightmare. She knelt on the bed with her rear bumper pointing up at the ceiling waiting for her boyfriend to do God knows what with it. How the hell had she ended up like this ? Where was Ross ? What WAS he doing behind her back ? She twisted around a bit and saw that he was rummaging around in THAT bag. The bag with all those horrid things in it. She had sat speechless as he showed her all his new toys. Her boyfriend had certainly put a dent into his credit card this afternoon. Or maybe he'd paid by cash. Her and her big mouth. All false bravado. She bit her lip nervously.
"Ross sweetie, you know when I said that I'd try anything once ?" she said.
"Hmmmmm..."
"Next time don't listen to a thing I say ok ?"
Ross laughed and turned around. "Sure, ok. You still want to try stuff ?"
Wide eyed, Rachel knew she should get the hell out of Dodge asap but a sense of "maybe this won't be THAT bad." curiosity got the better of her nerves. Only one way to find out. In at the deep end. One thing was for sure, Phoebe would have a field day with this.
"A..alright Ross, just don't do anything stupid." she mumbled as she got ready. "Wha...what are you going to try first ?" Barely had the question slipped from her lips than Ross turned holding the first impliment he'd shown her. It was the paddle.
Rachel gulped and shivered with fright. Though she was surprised to find herself relieved somewhat as well. It could of been worse, a lot worse. There was that other "treat" he'd taken from the bag and showed her. Her eyes had nearly popped out of her head when she saw it. It was a fearsome, wicked looking thing. He called it a Barber's strop, it was a short piece of beaten leather attached to a wooden grip that looked absolutely terrifying. She didn't fancy that at all. Using that on her rump was a long way from taking a spanking she suspected, a real long way.
Ross had approached their bed and her eyes were glued to the paddle with hung limply from his right hand. She didn't know what to think. So much for a "normal" relationship with boring Mr Geller. Ross had somehow turned from a steady boyfriend into Ozzy Osbourne !! Was there anymore skeletons in his cupboard she didn't know about ? By the look in his eyes she could tell he was really turned on by what was happening between them both. He was a totally different person to who she thought he was. She suddenly realised that the most important thing in their relationship was to be honest with each other. That was what was important. Could she trust him not to hurt her ? Not in the physical, her sore ass had accounted for that question, but in the emotional sense. Suddenly their eyes met and she knew he wouldn't. It would be ok. Everything would be alright, if a little painful. She saw the question in his gaze.
She nodded. "Alright, I'm ready............I think."
*
Rachel yelped out loud again as Ross adjusted his swing and brought the paddle in just below the overhang of both her by now rosy red bottom-cheeks. Ross stepped back to watch as she grabbed the pillows and bit into them, her knuckles turning white with the effort. The flesh of her ass was still rippling as the blow subsided and the sting rose. She was doing better than he'd ever hoped. She'd taken six to date. Starting reasonably, he'd increased the strength of each strike until numbers 4, 5 and 6 were delivered good and hard with the sound of the crack reverbarating around the bedroom along with his lover's howls of anguish. After every stroke he'd asked concerned. "Rachel, you ok. Do you want me to stop?"
With each stroke it'd taken her longer to reply but she had. "Ohhhhhhhh God that hurts Ross, but I'm...I'm ok. I think." she'd asked, turning her face to his. After number 3, he could see the trail of tears running down her cheeks and felt a twinge of guilt and was going to stop but she had whispered. "A..another one ?"
He waited patiently as she settled herself, blowing whisps of hair from her face and mumbling oddities to herself - "Must be mad...Out of my mind....Ask for more..." When she wasn't looking he stroked himself, he was poker hard and knew that when he - or she had had enough, he'd last all night long. His gaze fell on the soft bulb of her pubis and the ache in his loins made him realise that it was he who would give in first....
Raising the paddle, Ross listened as she began that tell-tale murmur of "Oh my God, Nooooooooo Rosssssss!!!" when she realised he was about to strike her ass again, plea's that trailed off into a painful scream and yelp as he brought the stiff leather down across both cheeks good and hard with a resounding CRACK.
This time there was no letting her recover, he cast the paddle aside and quickly covered her, smothering her in his desire and lust as she wrestled under him, turning, turning to welcome his thrusts inside her with matched panting and passion.
*
A long while later,
Rachel lay face down, spreadeagled, naked and glowing with a warm smile of satisfied contentment on her flushed face. She was completely sated. She could hear her body sighing contentedly as her climax subsided. A soft sigh that left her limp and covered in a sheen of post-lovemaking perspiration. She turned her face on her pillow to look at Ross. His eyes were closed and his chest was heaving in an ever decreasing rhythmn as his heartbeat slowed. He had a great big grin on his face.
She wasn't surprised, if he felt half as good as she did he'd have that smile on his face for the rest of the week. Wow, that had been quite a session. Even she was surprised at its overwhelming intensity and emotion. She closed her eyes too, feeling the dull ache that smothered her bottom as she tentatively flexed her muscles. Oh, oh my. Is that going to last for a long time !! The feeling was hard to describe or for her to get her head around the fact that her pleasure had come as result, or reward ?, from such searing pain. Don't try to reason with it she mused, there are some things in life that are just are or meant to be. There are no reason's for none were needed.
She smiled to herself and whispered to her lover who had turned to her and was gently running his hand over her bruised behind. "This Ross.....we absolutely MUST do again honey."
*
The End.
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